You Are Unique

A character based Program For 7th Grade Students

There is no one else like you because you are uniquely you. Your life influences those around you. Without you, the world would be a different place!

But even though you are each unique and one-of-a-kind, it is still possible to develop a negative self-image.

Is Your self-image Negative or positive?

1. If you are trying things before you’re fully prepared, potential failures can cause you to lose confidence in yourself. This lack of confidence can contribute to a negative self-image.
2. Comparing yourself to others means you spend most of your time trying to measure up. This can make you feel like a failure or you get so full of yourself that others can’t stand to be around you. Either way, this fosters a negative self-image.
3. Sticks and stones aren’t the only things that hurt. Words have the power to change how you view yourself. If you believe the harsh things others say about you, it can negatively affect how you feel about yourself.

Your self-image will have a direct impact on the choices you make about sex and dating. A negative self-image could result in negative relationship experiences.

How Do You Make Decisions?

1. Today’s culture and technology has wired you to expect immediate gratification. “I want to feel good right now!” If you want to be happy or feel good, instant entertainment is at your fingertips. Information is just a click of a button away. But is immediate satisfaction always good for us? You risk a lot by making rash decisions for pleasure.
2. If you aren’t in control of yourself, decisions are tough. Trying to make critical relationship decisions under the influence of drugs or alcohol can seriously impair your judgment. Which may lead to behaviors outside of your normal character. Those who drink alcohol are seven times likelier to have sex than those who don’t and twice as likely to engage in other risky behaviors. Good decisions under pressure are tough…good decisions with impaired judgement are near impossible.
3. Your friends may play more of a role in your decision-making than you realize. Peer pressure is hard to ignore. That’s why you should choose your friends carefully. Poor friendships can result in poor decision-making. As the saying goes, “Show me your friends and I will show you your future.” If that concept scares you, it may be time to evaluate your closest influences.

How you make decisions will directly impact your experiences with sex and dating.

What Is Sex?

Sex is typically defined as individuals engaging in acts that involve any form of physical contact with another person’s genitals. This can include hand to genital, mouth to genital, and genital to genital contact. Each of these scenarios have proven to expose teens to potential risks, of which, you may not be aware. And each of these forms of contact, if made without a person’s permission, fall into the category of sexual assault. So these are ALL considered sex.

Is It Love?

Many people choose to have sex because they think they’re in love. But is sex love? When love is not a part of sex, it’s called lust.

Love is seeking the highest and best for the other person, even if it means giving up your desires. It means you put someone else’s needs first.

Don’t confuse sex with love. They are not the same thing. Some people pursue sex for their own personal pleasure..sometimes at the expense of another’s feelings and health.

Well…what about Safe Sex?

Sex is any sexual behavior that puts you at risk of contracting a sexually transmitted disease (STD). This includes all three forms specified above. Research shows that 1 in 2 sexually active young people will contract an STD by 25 (Centers for Disease Control and Prevention).

For most people, safe sex means using condoms, but they aren’t 100% effective. Even leading experts agree, condoms aren’t “the most reliable ways to avoid” pregnancy and STDs. Condoms are typically about 82% effective — which means, about 15 to 18 out of 100 people who use them as their only birth control method will still get pregnant.

According to the same research, condoms provide a lot less protection against STDs transmitted via exposure to infected skin areas not covered by the condom. So can sex ever safe? Sure, when its done according to the safest measures defined by the CDC – “abstain from sexual activity, or…be in a long-term mutually monogamous relationship with an uninfected partner.”

What About Friends With Benefits?

Is it really possible to have friends “with benefits” and not be hurt emotionally? As a human, you are hardwired with a desire to bond with others. This is why your emotions get involved, no matter what the relationship is like.

When you add sex to a shallow relationship, however, that bond gets extremely confusing. This confusion can lead to an ugly breakup. When that “friendship” eventually ends, you end up hurt.

Emotionally, you want to feel important..like you’re wanted and you matter to others. You want to connect and communicate with friends and, ultimately, feel safe.

Sometimes we think sex is the only way partners can create that kind of bond. However, to feel like we matter, to keep good communication, and to feel safe in a relationship means we need to keep the confusion of sex out of the situation…for now.

Healthy Sex and Relationships

The experts we rely on have been doing thorough research on this subject for more than 30 years. And even after 30 years, they still recommend two options that provide you with the best, safest, and most enjoyable way to experience sex and relationships.

• For sex — they recommend for your safety that you practice abstinence from all sexual activity. Abstinence helps avoid lots of these consequences we have already discussed.
• For relationships — they recommend that you join yourself with one other person in a mutually monogamous relationship. This relationship means you will only have sex with that one other person in a committed relationship for the rest of your life.

The most common form of that relationship type in our culture is still marriage. Many long-time couples can speak to the wonderful benefits of monogamous sex for the rest of their lives. It enriches their emotional bonding, it helps make them feel secure and safe with each other, and ultimately it provides them with the opportunity to build a family on their terms. No accidents here!